Earlier today I had a meeting and first interview with BF.
I am pleased, she was everything I thought she�d be and then some.
She spent almost 15 mins. talking with me, sized me up completely, then proceeded to make key calls on my behalf.
She says that in her line of work it�s all �intuitive�.
Well thank God that I was giving the right vibes and that she was receiving them accordingly. For what it is all worth, everything seemed to click today.
I sat listening to her say things about me � all of which were positive.
Sad irony, it was hard for me to accept her gracious compliments and generous description.
Once she completed her calls, she turned to me, and I made eye contact with her. I had a HUGE lump in my throat. I thanked her for the graciousness and generosity of her comments. She didn�t miss a beat � replying �but they are all true of course.� She smiled immediately which put me at ease.
Why was it so hard for me to listen to a perfect stranger, talk about me, and use only positive adjectives in the same breath with my name?
I know the answer, and without putting you all through ancient history and a walk down Pain Lane I�ll say that I have traveled some distance from where I once was.
It boils down to the fact that it took a perfect stranger, to reinforce the point of just how much progress I�ve made.
I�m grateful and appreciative.
I needed to hear these things.
Not for ego, or for genuflecting.
I needed to know
Now that I do know, it�s as if I�ve been rejuvenated, somehow as if I�ve been given hope once more.
As I drove home I thought about where I�ve been and what I�ve done in my professional life. My tendencies to work more than I should, the ingrained and established patterns to which I�m not conscious � all of which find me taking on more and more responsibility with little or no praise. Is that my self-fulfilling prophecy?
Admittedly I am a work-a-holic. I thrive when I am busy and have a To Do list laden with tasks and projects.
What would Maslow say or think about this?
Many things were revealed to me today. I have tried to take something not so good and make it into something better. In some places I�ve succeeded, others are still a work in progress, and in a few places I still have work yet to do.
All I know is that no matter what happens my days, with my firm are numbered.
The writing is on the wall so to speak.
I�m in the driver�s seat, making decisions that will affect the rest of my life. I somehow had thought this would be a daunting position to be in, and perhaps even an overwhelming undertaking.
I couldn�t be happier to be wrong. It is neither daunting nor overwhelming.
Today I feel exhilarated, encouraged, and enthusiastic.
Today, when asked �Souljourn, based on your skills and experiences, what employer wouldn�t want you?� I smiled inwardly. Confirmation that my hard work, effort, sleepless nights, sacrifice and prayers had come to fruition.
I�m grateful to have been given the opportunities to demonstrate my capabilities, in the first place.
I�m happy to have been the person who opened doors - possibly dispelling myths and stereotypes in the process.
I never set out to be anyone�s role model.
Today I came to find out that I was and I am.
I am humbled by it all.
This is a very good place to be in life. In all honesty I never thought I�d get to this point.
Ever.
I am learning it�s a good thing to be wrong sometimes.