Amongst the adults numerous memories were shared, interesting topics of conversation abounded.
Last week, we broke bread, prayed, laughed, talked and fellowshipped as many times as our bodies and life schedules would permit.
Last week�s events resonated and reinforced a few key paradigms within me.
- The breaking of bread is more than a necessity � it is a vital, spiritual act.
-Good company and stimulating dialogue, like all other things good, are capable of nourishing a person, on so many levels.
On the heels, of the fulfillment of my own 12 year promise � during the festivities, I could literally feel the Torch of Education I�d been carrying for so long, grow exponentially lighter. My encumbering emotional heaviness was transformed into a jubilance I have not felt, for quite some time.
To say that I was �pleased with myself� is an understatement. Nothing and no one could break or alter my Spirit. I was in my moment and nothing I could do, kept it from showing. For the first time in a long while, I didn�t mind if others saw and asked me what was the cause for my unmistakable countenance of happiness and contentment. The phrase that came to mind repeatedly was �you did it, YOU really did it.�.
Pride, generally speaking is not a good thing to endeavor towards. However personal pride, the kind one feels and radiates outwards, for a job well done, a course stayed, repeated challenges overcome and surmounted � I believe Pride in this form alone, is a acceptable to display and share.
Back to reality�Quite literally school is going to be work. I have no problems with that. I am no stranger to hard, honest work. I am taking on new and different projects, at my office. I am looking for a part time bartending gig � private parties, at this time of the year, are honestly few and far between. I have my reasons for wanting and needing a secondary income, to fall back on. Trust me, I know really do know what I�m doing.. Nothing about the newest leg of my journey, which begins June 30th should be bringing a smile to my face. Yet in the midst of my impending reality all I can do is smile. I really did make it. All of my prayers, hopes, wishes and dreams mattered.
There is a great deal to be said for �hope�.
I have heard it said that the earlier parts of a sojourn are the easier ones. God help me if this is true. God be with me, because I cannot make it alone.
It is not going to be easy. It is not going to be convenient. There will be tests and challenges and I�m not speaking in the academic realm here. None of that daunts me. I will not be denied. I�ve made up my mind.
I think that the key here is to not look back.
EverForward, as Tiombe* says, onwards, upwards that�s the mentality I�ve got to embrace, and make my own. Behave almost as if I�m wearing custom made, academic blinders.
I must achieve this goal. It is the one gift I have longed to give myself.
